Who woulda thunk you can’t believe what twits twit?
More stuff you can’t make up.
A woman accused of illegally entering the Thousand Oaks home of a man she went on multiple dates with was arrested Sunday after firefighters used jackhammers to partially dismantle a brick chimney she had become trapped inside.
She was clearly not related to Santa Claus.
And that’s not a good thing.
Boys who will be boys think with the small head.
Honest to Pete, you can’t make this stuff up. If you can’t tell the difference between your work computer and your personal computer, you deserve to be punished for stupid.
. . . and reruns of Lawrence Welk.
I mean, really, now.
This poor railroad engineer will have to live with the memory of this the rest of his or her life, and it wasn’t his or her fault.
As my two or three regular readers know, I worked for the railroad for over two decades; this sort of stuff happens every day because persons carelessly (and sometimes intentionally) put themselves in harm’s way, forgetting that the railroad is a place of business, not a scenic overlook or a nature trail or a shortcut to where they want to go.
Don’t take chances with trains.
If it’s a tie, you lose.
When I was in college, I thought briefly about joining a fraternity. Then I realized, why the hell should I pay dues to get drunk, when I could get drunk quite nicely on my own for the cost of a six.
I guess I missed the part about exploiting co-eds to make myself feel like a Real Big Man.
Mark Sanford facebooks his Republican Family Values (follow the link for even more Republican Family Values):
The ex–South Carolina governor and current congressman, Appalachian Trail hiker, and perpetual seeker has written a 2,375-word Facebook post about his latest legal battle with ex-wife Jenny Sanford. Its tone, if not its exact content, will be familiar to anyone who has ever heard a middle-aged man self-righteously complain about what a mean, nasty lady his former spouse is, so feel totally free to ignore it on this beautiful Friday afternoon. Really, the only interesting thing in Sanford’s status update is the news that he has broken off his engagement with María Belén Chapur, the Argentine “soul mate” for whom he (in)famously left Jenny and the governorship of South Carolina in 2009.
No self-awareness, no self-awareness whatsoever.
The resident curmudgeon at my local rag wonders why drivers rush in where angels dare to tread–tread water, that is.