You can’t make this stuff up.

This, by the by, is nothing new.

Share
10 May 2016 · Comments Off on Backfire, the Law Doesn’t Apply to Me Dept. · Categories: The New Secesh, Words Fail Me

The best-laid plans of mice and militants gang aft agley.

Ammon Bundy led the occupation of the Malheur National Wildlife Refuge intending to force a civil court to take up the constitutionality of federal land management policy, his lawyers contend in new court papers filed Monday.

He had expected the government to issue an eviction or ejection claim instead of arresting and indicting the occupiers on federal charges in criminal court.

The oddest bit in the story is this (emphasis added):

His (Ammon Bundy’s–ed.) lawyers assert that Bundy isn’t a member of any militia, isn’t an extremist and doesn’t hold anti-government views — underlining each contention in bold type in their 33-page motion and memorandum filled with lengthy footnotes. (The story goes on to recite wingnut babble about “Fed-rul overreach.”)

I can’t speak to the bit about “militia” (I suspect this boils down to “not having a membership card”), but, as regards the other two contentions, I fear actions doth drowneth out words.

The sky-is-purple level chutzpah, though, merits admiration.

Afterthought:

I am nonplussed at the ability of wingnuts to convince themselves that carrying miniature copies of the Constitution of the United States of America in their shirt pockets, to be whipped out and misinterpreted at the slightest provocation, magickally mystickally morphs sedition into patriotism.

There’s no delusion like self-delusion.

It’s the best delusion there is.

Share
04 May 2016 · Comments Off on Style over Substance Something or Other · Categories: Political Theatre, Words Fail Me

Now that Ted Cruz is off the island, I reckon that the Republican Party is now officially the reality show party, which prompts the question, is the Republican Party most akin to Survivor or Here Comes Honey Boo-Boo?

I’m voting for Honey Boo-Boo.

Will Bunch tries to figure it out. Here’s a bit from his post (follow the link for the rest):

Tomorrow’s newspapers will be chock full of analyses about how Trump nailed down the Republican nomination in Indiana, but that’s not even the real import of the astonishing thing that has just happened. The Republican Party, in its desperation to “unify” and salvage something, anything, for the November election, not just nominated but “normalized” a would-be president whose casual embrace of goon violence at his overheated rallies, whose toxic spew of insults or hate policies towards women, immigrants, or Muslims never seems to stop, and whose embrace of harmful conspiracy theories from vaccines to President Obama’s birth certificate has already made a mockery of America around the world. What Indiana really did is put a seal of approval on a scary, not-good, horrible chapter in our politics and our history.

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.

Share
01 May 2016 · Comments Off on Q. Why Did Computers Become Popular? · Categories: Words Fail Me

A. Men are pigs.

Share
22 April 2016 · Comments Off on Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Glorious Spam · Categories: Words Fail Me

Yes, Virginia, there is a new Spam Museum.

Share
27 March 2016 · Comments Off on Great Moments in Proofreading · Categories: Words Fail Me

From today’s local rag:

Scan of wedding announcement stating that someone "severed as best man.:"

More »

Share
12 March 2016 · Comments Off on Schools of Fools · Categories: Words Fail Me

One more time, is there a special stupid test you have to pass to be a school administrator?

Aside:

Honor Roll for second graders? Really?

Share
09 March 2016 · Comments Off on Great Moments in Adspeak · Categories: Words Fail Me

Free admission? Really?

Like they’re going to turn away customers?

Full Disclosure:

This is an excellent local merchant whom we patronize when it’s time for spring and fall planting. Nevertheless, I just couldn’t let the adspeak slip by.

Flyer for garden center advertising free admission to a "show" which is really a sale.

Share
29 February 2016 · Comments Off on Flack the Children · Categories: Mammon, Too Stupid for Words, Words Fail Me

We have a polity assemblage that believes in magic demands the government provide services while simultaneously refusing to pay for them.

Share
23 February 2016 · Comments Off on Public Eructation · Categories: Words Fail Me

You can’t make this stuff up.

Share
01 January 2016 · Comments Off on The Year in Rebuke, V · Categories: Words Fail Me

The question of the year: Why does David Brooks still have a job?

Share
14 December 2015 · Comments Off on Progeny · Categories: Words Fail Me

Dear Karl Rove,

With any luck, my grandchildren will still be alive.

Yours truly,

Frank.

P. S.: Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.

Share
20 November 2015 · Comments Off on A Nation of Scaredy-Cats · Categories: Politics of Hate, Words Fail Me

Jesus, Mary, and Joseph.

I am ashamed of my country and of its having a major political party that panders to, stokes, and relies on bigotry.

I shall stop now, because all I have left is profanity.

Addendum, the Next Morning:

Crank Bear has the profanity so I don’t have to.

Share

You can’t make this stuff up.

Share
26 October 2015 · Comments Off on Facebook Frolics · Categories: Words Fail Me

Green-eyed frolics.

Share
12 October 2015 · Comments Off on Twits on Twitter · Categories: Words Fail Me

Legal twits.

Share

A local Republican member of the Virginia House of Delegates has proposed an Indiegogo campaign to build roads.

It would be simpler if he and his fellow Republican legislators faced up to their responsibility to maintain the Commonwealth, but that’s not going to happen, now, is it?

Jesus.

Share
10 October 2015 · Comments Off on Heaven Forbid Kids Should Be Kids · Categories: Words Fail Me

Now they need recess consultants, apparently because third graders’ unstructured play is a bad thing.

One more time, is there some sort of intelligence test persons must fail so as to become school administrators?

(Remember what a consultant is: Anyone more than 50 miles from home toting a laptop bag.)

Via Thoreau.

Share
03 October 2015 · Comments Off on What’s Happening, Dude? · Categories: Too Stupid for Words, Words Fail Me

Stuff, Bro.

No human decency. None whatsoever.

Jesus.

Share
26 September 2015 · Comments Off on The Privatization Scam · Categories: Words Fail Me

The scammers have a new target.

Conversation is building in Washington on this question: Would the FAA be better able to handle its regulatory duties if the day-to-day operations of air traffic control were privatized?

The FAA, in a burst of sanity, is against the idea. Those who favor are it, natch, the folks who believe that there is no such thing as the public good.

Details of the con at the link.

Share